Taunting Skinny People
I do not want to turn this into an “us against them” blog but I do enjoy passing “skinny” people on a bike. It is rare that is happens on the flats even more rare on a climb. So when it happens, you can be sure I am ear to ear catching flying protein in my teeth. (Probably gaining more weight) 

Like a lion, I seek out the riders in the pack that “look” good but are a little out of shape. (Understand, where I live there is a lot of disposable cash and lots of “oneupsmanship”—so it is not uncommon to see a new riders learning to how to clip in on an all carbon bike, with $300 Sidi shoes and a perfectly matched outfit by Castelli.)  If there is a weak one in the pack, I can usually catch them when they are doubled over gasping for air.

Fertile Hunting Grounds
I was riding up Mt. Eden when I passed a young couple (skinny, perfect outfits and gorgeous bikes) taking a break about a 1/3 of the way up the steepest part of the climb. I pedaled by them and greeted them with the usual hello and small talk. The good news is I was not out of breath and they were gasping for air. I found my weak gazelles.

Not long after I passed them—they were on my heels. They passed me as we both worked up the hill. As they passed me—I could smell the weakness and see it in their overall riding form. The climb has “s” turns so they were out of sight in no time. As I made it around the turn at a blazing 6.3 miles per hour (2 mph faster then the last time I did the hill 4 months ago—and at a better heart rate level.) there were my gazelles. The male was pouring water on his face and the female was doubled over her handlebars.

Let the taunting begin
I enjoy passing people on the road more than when they are standing on the side—but I will take what I can get. I just smiled and cleared my throat a little. Just as I passed them I said, “don’t let the fat guy beat you to the top—the bicycling gods will disown you.” They laughed between their gasps for air and the guy exclaimed “oh man, that’s brutal.” He got it—I was taking a shot as his pride and it was a direct hit.

Moments later—I could hear him grinding up the hill behind me. His pride had him standing up on his pedals trying to catch me. I knew there was no way he could keep up the pace all the to the top—so I just kept pedaling. Once he got close, “I turned to him and said come on lets push it all the way to the top.” With my heart rate at 148, I knew I had enough left in my reserves to make a sprint to the top of the hill. He was with me for about 2 hundred yards and then I heard him say, “I am done.”

I just kept pedaling—but know, I was ear to ear. “Wahoo!”

Later that ride, I ended up on my back twice. After only having one fall in my riding history, to fall twice in one ride was a little disheartening. Turns out there are more skinny bicycling gods there are fat bicycling gods and my taunting did not go unpunished. But it was worth it.